Scorching hot seductresses of a certain age know how to dress for the hunt! Please allow me to introduce myself. I am a young Hispanic man (twenty something), confident, well groomed, with a great sense of fashion and good looks (so I’ve been told), and completely awe stricken at the Cougar’s uncanny ability to subdue even the cockiest of young men.
Last Thursday my wife, a fashion model and also a twenty something like myself (obviously not a Cougar), and I went to Wildfish for happy hour. We typically haunt on Friday when the crowd is loud and boisterous, where men, both young and seasoned, butt heads in an effort to win the attention of the ladies, and the craft beer and cosmos flow incessantly from 4 – 7. But for no particular reason at all, perhaps fate, we decided that Thursday would be our night. As we walked through the unusually large, heavy glass doors and headed toward the bar. I quickly noticed that this was not the ambiance I had grown accustomed to at my Wildfish. I turned to look at my wife but her facial expression said “it’s business as usual”; have a couple of cosmos, suck down the usual round of raw oysters and call it a night. The bar was full, as always, but the mood was tamed and subdued by an air of je ne sais quoi, and wine, house red and white, littered the bar rather than the aforementioned libations.
Anyway, we took a seat at the foot of the bar, not our usual spot, and ordered the usual from not our usual bartender; vodka soda for me, cosmos for my wife and a round of raw oysters. But before I would even grip my first drink, or open my mouth to say something to my wife (god only knows what), the heavy glass doors opened. But wait! They appeared to almost open on their own (the doors at this Wildfish are not automatic); as if a gentle breeze had blown them open, or maybe it was the work of angels, and the silhouette of a stunning woman appeared before a sun-drenched backdrop. My eyes were fixated on her (This my wife did notice but not the obvious change in ambiance? Huh? I’m not a pervert; I promise). As she made her way to the bar, her silhouette started to take shape. Flowing, silky locks of hair (brunette) bounced to the rhythm of her sturdy, yet easy stride, skin kissed by a gentle tan, (not the tan-in-a-bottle type), a healthy set of, “cough” (I’m a gentleman; I think) pronounced yet softened by a swaying, hypnotizing effect, and legs that appeared to be making their way straight toward me, although she was walking toward the opposite side of the bar. After what seemed like an eternity, she finally claimed her barstool.
As she extended her noticeably toned bicep to place her caviar Chanel bag on the squeaky clean bar, the dim light above revealed a light drizzle of freckles on her shoulders and chest (I love freckles! My wife has freckles.) She sat down and took a thorough yet discreet look around the bar and, what?, stops when she reaches my end of the bar? Yes! Her eyes were making contact with mine. At this point, I was in a trance-like, hyper-focused state only broken by the sound of my wife’s voice (god only knows what she was saying). But that’s when I realized the familiar face. Finally my wife’s words started to take shape. Slowly, then faster and clearer; “You’re drooling on the bar”, she said. “I know her”, I said. “That’s Candace, an old family friend! Her and my mom grew up together. They’re of the same age; 55, I think.” “Really?” uttered my wife in a tone of almost forced disbelief and with an added tinge of contempt. “Yes, let me introduce you.” “I knew that was you. All of Maria’s boys are distinctively handsome”, she said in a low and silky voice as she pulled out her classic, quilted Chanel wallet (I’m not making this up, I promise!)
Anyway, we took a seat at the foot of the bar, not our usual spot, and ordered the usual from not our usual bartender; vodka soda for me, cosmos for my wife and a round of raw oysters. But before I would even grip my first drink, or open my mouth to say something to my wife (god only knows what), the heavy glass doors opened. But wait! They appeared to almost open on their own (the doors at this Wildfish are not automatic); as if a gentle breeze had blown them open, or maybe it was the work of angels, and the silhouette of a stunning woman appeared before a sun-drenched backdrop. My eyes were fixated on her (This my wife did notice but not the obvious change in ambiance? Huh? I’m not a pervert; I promise). As she made her way to the bar, her silhouette started to take shape. Flowing, silky locks of hair (brunette) bounced to the rhythm of her sturdy, yet easy stride, skin kissed by a gentle tan, (not the tan-in-a-bottle type), a healthy set of, “cough” (I’m a gentleman; I think) pronounced yet softened by a swaying, hypnotizing effect, and legs that appeared to be making their way straight toward me, although she was walking toward the opposite side of the bar. After what seemed like an eternity, she finally claimed her barstool.
As she extended her noticeably toned bicep to place her caviar Chanel bag on the squeaky clean bar, the dim light above revealed a light drizzle of freckles on her shoulders and chest (I love freckles! My wife has freckles.) She sat down and took a thorough yet discreet look around the bar and, what?, stops when she reaches my end of the bar? Yes! Her eyes were making contact with mine. At this point, I was in a trance-like, hyper-focused state only broken by the sound of my wife’s voice (god only knows what she was saying). But that’s when I realized the familiar face. Finally my wife’s words started to take shape. Slowly, then faster and clearer; “You’re drooling on the bar”, she said. “I know her”, I said. “That’s Candace, an old family friend! Her and my mom grew up together. They’re of the same age; 55, I think.” “Really?” uttered my wife in a tone of almost forced disbelief and with an added tinge of contempt. “Yes, let me introduce you.” “I knew that was you. All of Maria’s boys are distinctively handsome”, she said in a low and silky voice as she pulled out her classic, quilted Chanel wallet (I’m not making this up, I promise!)
Candace was a full-fledged Cougar. She was recently divorced from a marriage of 35 years and is at the top of her game. And for some odd reason, she and my wife really hit it off. They conversed as if they had been friends forever despite the 30 year age gap. That’s when I started to notice something. Both women are extremely beautiful, but what makes their beauty so different despite the obvious?
That’s when it hit me. In my world travels, I visited many cities, all beautiful in their own unique way. The city of Prague in the Czech Republic, for example, has gracefully withstood the test of time, while maintaining a pristine elegance that becomes more venerable and desirable as the years go by; a beauty that is enhanced by the passage of time in a world where the super-modern metropolises are commonplace. Austin, TX, on the other hand, is a chic young city, full of life and new experience. A city that personifies freedom and adventure with an endless nightlife guaranteed to deliver a lifetime of memories of sex, love and rock and roll. Yes! Candace is Prague and my lovely wife is Austin, both beautiful in their own unique way.
But it’s Prague’s masterfully crafted Gothic architecture, towering steeples, endless courtyards and carefully hidden dungeons that give it its distinctive greatness. And the same could be said of Candace; the clothes complete the Cougar. With an outfit like Candace’s you will be guaranteed a successful hunt every time. Are you a woman of a certain age? Want to know what she wore? Here it is from head to toe:
This Roberto Cavalli Sequined Zebra Top will stop any young man dead in his tracks! Catch this hop piece at Neiman Marcus
Candace chose the Missoni Skinny Pants that night. They gave her the perfect silhouette! Available at Bergdorf Goodman
The Christian Louboutin t-strap sandal...Mercy!!! Check out this sassy pair at Barneys
Oh, let's not forget the Chanel caviar leather handbag. Candace's is vintage and after scouring the Internet for hours trying to find one just like hers, this is the closest I could get; but not quite. (She's special)
Other accessories included a pair of diamond drop earrings (my wife thinks they were Cartier but I'm not so convinced; she's not the type), a large opaque silver bangle and two oversized cocktail rings.
But wait! Not all cougars are enjoying the fruits of a seven figure divorce settlement. You can pull-off the Candace look in a budget. Try this on for a change.
Zebra Sequined top available at Express for only $39.50
Get this pair of skinnys for just $99 at bebe
This pair of Caparros t-strap sandals is going for $62.30 at Bloomingdales
Snag this quilt pattern handbag at Topshop for $50
Accessorize at your discretion. Be creative but don't overdo it. Happy hunting!!!
The next installment of "The Cougar - Dressed for the Hunt" is soon to follow.
~Brooklyn
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